Crazy to the Nth degree

Accidentally discovered that one of our implants when in someone who has a heart attack and then is heavily sedated can sometimes short, creating random behavior to a degree no one would be happy to observe. Sorry to the implantee and all the friends and relatives now going through hell.

Sometimes the implants are a mixed blessing

Sarah Palin's speech the other night? All me. Wrote it, dictated it, pushed it out. The implants make it possible. On the other hand, I also heard/saw the celebration sex that night. Ew.

Excellent! Time for another implant. These are so much more interesting than probing. More exacting work, more challenging, and most important there is so much less squealing. And no smell. Sarah Palin, we're on our way.

Well, duh

Of course Robert Novak has a brain tumor. It's a common side effect of the implant we've been using. You didn't think he was that big a prick on his own, did you?

8/4 UPDATE: Sorry, Bob. Might've helped if you held a charitable thought in your head, stroked a puppy, didn't run over a bicyclist, stuff like that. It affects the neuropeptides, which affects the brain tissue's interaction with the implant. I guess we should have mentioned that.