You're so screwed

Your governments are at least as inefficient as ours. We take no pleasure in this. It's a bit depressing, really. We hope that new species will be better in some way, but we're constantly disappointed. You all suck as much as we do. For instance, the above map shows water vapor all over the world. Does it look radically different than you would have drawn on your own? Fast answer: No. It's a shitty map. If we're supposed to convince you that we are advanced and you need to listen to what we say, this is exactly what we need to avoid.

As your saying goes, 'Even a broken clock...'

Interesting story out of North Carolina. Interesting not because it's about a man who believes in UFOs. Obviously we do exist. It's interesting because he is clearly a complete nutjob, and yet there's this: In recent years, he said, he has heard many reports of UFOs drawing energy off of power lines and draining water out of reservoirs.

It's true. Drawing a little electricity helps lower the cost of running a spaceship, and we need water. After all, in a few months you won't need it anymore.